“It’s okay, he’s a doctor.”

Location: DC

I’m interning in DC this summer.  This gem of a story happened outside of the office with my fellow intern.

The other night, it was getting pretty late and a group of us decided to leave the bar.  We walked a block to a pizza place, where I find my friend telling some girls that he had just graduated med school and was opening a private practice (false).  Anyways, this fight between a bunch of Georgetown guys erupts in the middle of the street in front of the pizza place.

The guys were drunk and nothing serious was really happening.  A huge crowd had gathered as they were going at it.  At one point, a guy walked away from the fight and bent over to catch a breath.  Out of nowhere, another guy comes from the fight and kicks him in the face like David Beckham hammering a direct kick to the upper 90.  The guy lands on his back, unconscious.  One chick starts screaming, “HE’S DEAD! HE’S DEAD!!!!”

Everyone is freaking out.  Then someone in the crowd goes, “Should we call an ambulance?”  To which a girl responds, “It’s okay, he’s a doctor” and points to my friend, eating a slice of pizza.  He’s about to go check some vitals and do some CPR to this unconscious guy, when a friend of ours from school yells, “He’s not a doctor, I go to school with him!  He’s not even a pre-med!”  The chick who thought he was a doctor goes, “Yeah, if you wouldn’t be eating pizza if you were a doctor.”  Cover: blown.